Revelation 21:4 "He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.”
Softball, we LOVED softball and were pretty good at it. The summers filled with heat, dirt and sand, the smell of leather gloves and balls hitting the bats. We had all played together pretty much since Kindergarten. It was our last summer tournament before the class of '96' went off to college and we all knew that things "change" once you go to college. We were a team made up of female athletes from the classes of 1996, 1997 and 1998. Yes, AWESOME athletes!! For our small B school...Girls b-ball state tournament 2 years in a row, super star track runners, Spirit of Six recipients (most honored cheerleading award in the state), Boys b-ball 2nd in the state, football (I think it was our first year ever to regionals)...and we have not even mentioned our amazing band and choir!! We worked hard and played hard too!
Saturday, July 20th, 1996
It was early-mid morning and we all met at the Dago, the Warner watering hole, to head to Huron. I can hear mom's words like yesterday, "Honey girl, please only drive if you have to." You see, the parentals had recently purchased a mini-van. Those crazy pointed front Sillouette ones. I HATE those vans...whenever I see one now, the pit in my stomach lasts for 2-3 hours. Anyway, being the "wants everyone to be able to ride together" kind of girl that I am, instead of a bunch of us needing to take two cars...I said, "I'll just drive, that way we can all ride together!" All the while my mom's voice was in the back of my head.
For some reason that weekend, we just ended up playing better opponents I guess. We lost both games on Saturday, therefore we didn't even make the losers bracket. Softball summer of '96' was over. We had all planned on camping out that night anticipating at least one win, so several of us decided to stay and you know...Do what 18 and 17 year old kids do by the fire. Yup, have a few drinks.
When you go through a difficult situation, you never know which parts you are going to remember. But I will NEVER forget when we were walking away from that last game...Jodi was just tearing up, needing a hug and said, "I just wanted to win that game." I had my arm around her and I think Jess stepped in too. At that moment, it had already been determined that Jodi (the youngster of the group) was also going to stay with us for the evening. Looking over at her mom, Jodi gave us a great grin and so did her mom. Jessica's mom Joan said what everyone was thinking. "Take good care of her!" I think she then even said something to Charity or Miss like, "You two are in charge!" I wish and pray every day I had been more responsible.......
The day we all were changed...Somewhere around 4:30am, a bunch of us woke up to a terrible storm. I recall thunder and believe there was some lightening. We had two choices...1. Head home because no one was going to sleep through this thing, or 2. Go to Sioux Falls for a quick trip to see our dear friend Trecil who had been in a terrible head-on car accident about 2 months prior. She was still in ICU, couldn't talk, couldn't walk or eat, but had at least woken up from the coma. Again, thinking that we needed to go and see her because most of us had not had the opportunity yet, we knew the right thing to do was go to the hospital about 2-2.5 hours away. We probably rolled out of there around 5am or so.
Sometime around 10:00amish we knew we had to get back home because Jess had to check-in at All-Star Practice! The hope was to be home around 1:00pm. At this point we were all starving! A quick stop at Dairy Queen before we got back on the Highway. I think the majority of us got real food, but not Jodi. Nope, all she wanted was ice cream! In hind sight, we are all so glad she got just what she wanted.
We had a blast that afternoon shopping. Jodi was able to snag a kid pair of Girbaud jeans. Our little cheerleading flyer was sooo tiny! We all convinced her to get them because they were so reasonable and they looked amazing on her! That evening was just a great time with girlfriends, enjoying pizza at Godfather's in the mall and hanging out. For some reason, thank you Jesus, I just didn't want any alcohol that night. As most of you know, this was very unusual for Vilhauer, but the rest had a great time!
Sunday, July 21st, 1996
1 Corinthians 15:51 Behold! I tell you a mystery. We shall not all sleep, but we shall all be changed.
1 Corinthians 15:51 Behold! I tell you a mystery. We shall not all sleep, but we shall all be changed.
The day we all were changed...Somewhere around 4:30am, a bunch of us woke up to a terrible storm. I recall thunder and believe there was some lightening. We had two choices...1. Head home because no one was going to sleep through this thing, or 2. Go to Sioux Falls for a quick trip to see our dear friend Trecil who had been in a terrible head-on car accident about 2 months prior. She was still in ICU, couldn't talk, couldn't walk or eat, but had at least woken up from the coma. Again, thinking that we needed to go and see her because most of us had not had the opportunity yet, we knew the right thing to do was go to the hospital about 2-2.5 hours away. We probably rolled out of there around 5am or so.
Jess wanted to be sure we let our parents know where we were headed, so we stopped along at a pay phone some where around Mitchell, SD to call my mom. It was probably somewhere b/w 6:30 and 7:00am. Please note this was 18 years ago and long BEFORE everyone had a cell phone in their pocket.
A groggy mom picks up, "Hello...?"
"Hey Mom, It's me!"
Pause..."Honey girl? Where are you?"
"Mooooommm (insert teenage annoyed tone), remember the softball tournament in Huron? And now we are going to see Trecil in the hospital in Sioux Falls."
LONG pause...."Oh, yeah, right...Sorry I forgot. Ok, well drive careful and we will see you when you get home."
Please remember this long pause...
So, we saw Trecil, had a great time talking to her, listening to and watching MTV. Yes, back when they actually showed Music Videos. She seemed really happy to see us, and the couple of times we tried to leave her heart rate would raise, so we felt like she knew we were there and didn't want us to leave.
Sometime around 10:00amish we knew we had to get back home because Jess had to check-in at All-Star Practice! The hope was to be home around 1:00pm. At this point we were all starving! A quick stop at Dairy Queen before we got back on the Highway. I think the majority of us got real food, but not Jodi. Nope, all she wanted was ice cream! In hind sight, we are all so glad she got just what she wanted.
Fast forward to approximately a little after 11:15pm. The absolute worst moment of my life and most of the small town of Warner's life. It happened...I fell asleep at the wheel. I wake up to us swerving to the right, and we hit a reflector pole...In my mind, "Dammit, that is going to leave a mark on the van." Now swerving to the left, back to the right, a scream from the back seat, and we are back towards the left now in the median and rolling, rolling, rolling. The police department says it was anywhere from 5-8 times that we rolled. Apparently, after a car has rolled 5 times it is hard to tell.
We finally came to a stop...it feels like there is grit or glass or something in my mouth. You feel groggy after having been at those speeds and in a moving object. I look over at Jess, she looks at me. We are both in the front seat with our seat belts on. Karlie and Jodi had been in the back asleep with no seatbelts on. I take my seatbelt off, and open the driver's door. Jess, relayed to me later...I kept looking at you and thinking how do I get out of here. I can't figure out how to get my seatbelt off. She remembers coming to and blanking out several times. She clearly had a concussion.
I could hear Karlie Dee up ahead of the van. Ya'll she was ahead of us...do you know what that means? Yes, she was thrown from the vehicle going approximately 80 miles an hour. Estimates are that she flew 75-80 feet. I thank God everyday that she is alive. We go running up to her..."Karlie, Karlie, are you ok?" She replies, "Yes, but I think I broke my foot."
You learn in times like these that your mind only allows you to see what you can handle at that very moment. Her ankle was literally hanging by a vein. However, when looking down at it, it looked perfectly fine, so we went running back through the luggage to find Jodi.
Jodi, Jodi, where is Jodi. Our luggage was thrown out all around in the median. Finally, spotting her all the way back at the beginning of the luggage. What you need to know is that her body looked absolutely perfect.
You then do what any 18 year old does after having been in a horrific car accident...You go running with your arms flailing up to the highway in the hopes that someone, anyone will stop. A lot of things happened and were said in what felt like hours. Remember this is rural America and in fact it did take over an hour for the two ambulances to arrive. I still do not understand this. We were between Brookings and Watertown...it should not have taken that long.
The Lord's Prayer was said, over and over and over.
The call to my parents. Dad picked up, "Vilhauers," in his always chipper voice.
"Dad, it's me. We were in a terrible accident. I fell asleep. Jess and I are ok. Karlie broke her ankle, and Jodi is turning blue."
The words which followed from my father's mouth will never, EVER be forgotten. When we talked about it afterwards, he said he didn't even remember saying them.
"Honey girl, that's ok. These things happen. We will call their parents and be there as soon as we can."
A week later, after Jodi's funeral. Mom said to me, "Honey girl, do you know why I was so confused when you girls called from Mitchell? It was because we thought you were at home. You have always talked in your sleep (my room is right below my parents), and that night we had heard voices in your room. It woke both your dad and I up. And we both heard the same thing. It was a voice saying, wait, Wait, WAIT. Three waits and each one got louder. We just assumed it was you and went back to sleep."
She went on to say that it must have been our three Angels saying wait that is wasn't our time. My bestie who is one of the strongest Christians I know, later explained to me, "Oh honey, you have got it all wrong, that was the creator giving his instructions."
Truth is...my mom doesn't know this...but I have always wondered if it really happened and if both her and dad actually heard those voices down in my room. Or if it was the advice of some child psychologist telling them to use a story like that to help me get through being responsible for Jodi's passing...
Now age 36 and the real truth is...I don't want to know. Maybe this is my ultimate LEAP OF FAITH. That I was supposed to be the one driving that day. That I was the one to bear the burden.
Those 3 words wait, Wait, WAIT have gotten me through the really tough days. The days when I wonder why I wasn't the one taken...why was I the one responsible for driving. Dammit, why did I fall asleep? Thinking about the holidays, birthdays and special moments that Jodi's family is having to celebrate without her. The fact that her mom never got to go wedding dress shopping with her only daughter, and her father never got to walk her down the aisle. That her brother is now an only child and what pressure and loneliness that must put on him.
Those 3 words wait, Wait, WAIT have gotten me through the really tough days. The days when I wonder why I wasn't the one taken...why was I the one responsible for driving. Dammit, why did I fall asleep? Thinking about the holidays, birthdays and special moments that Jodi's family is having to celebrate without her. The fact that her mom never got to go wedding dress shopping with her only daughter, and her father never got to walk her down the aisle. That her brother is now an only child and what pressure and loneliness that must put on him.
That Karlie feels the need to pose a certain way with her foot in every picture so her ankle is hidden. Again, we are so thankful that she is alive, but the number of surgeries, pain meds, etc. etc. that she has had to endure is just too much for any one person. She is an amazing cheerleader and had to sit in a wheel chair her senior year on the side lines and could no longer be the flyer in all of the stunts that she was accustomed too. In her words though...18 years later I find myself able to finally wear shorts, skirts and dresses knowing my scars give only a statement of the confidence in the triumph of living a life that God has given me - to love, give hope and help others achieve more.
You find yourself wondering why an entire town did not get to see the most amazing person develop into a varsity cheerleader, woman, wife and mother. She truly brought light to everyone around her, and those eyes...those deep blue eyes!! If you can picture a fluttering, beautiful butterfly, mixed with a jumping around happy bunny, (she was always walking around on her toes) with the most amazing light and Christian spirit...That was Jodi in the flesh. She was the one, whom when she walked into a room, the place just lit up. Jodi Lynn was always happy, always did the right thing, and quite frankly, was the only one ready to go. God needed her upstairs and closer to him to do his work. You know the song, (Only the good die young).
It has now been 18 years, Jodi Lynn has come to many of our minds during the most special moments of our lives. When walking the Great Wall of China...she is there, in the silent night of a hospital room holding a new born baby...she is there. When driving down a quiet gravel road and seeing a falling star...she is there. When we turned, 20, 30...she was there. She will continue to be there when we celebrate our 20-year class reunions, when we turn 40, when we meet our grandchildren for the first time and most definitely, when we walk through those pearly gates.
If you have a memory of Jodi, will you please share it? Her life and amazing spirit are meant to be remembered. It has been 18 years, but to many of us it feels just like yesterday that we were throwing her in the air, drinking Mello Yello and listening to Alanis Morissette - Isn't it Ironic. We love you so much Jodi and miss you each and every day!!!!!!!
